Where Are They Now? Fishermen Posing For Pictures Holding Up A Large Fish Of Some Kind

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You hardly see this at all anymore. It’s being chalked up to a dying art form.

Back when I was a kid, however, sport enthusiasts were holding up their catches like gangbusters!

I blame global warming…

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Red Sox Fan Pukes On Everybody Below Him!

Click here to view the embedded video.

Meh, I can hardly blame the guy. If I were forced to watch a boring game like baseball for a minimum of nine innings straight, I’d probably drink to excess too.

Who am I kidding? I drink to excess when I watch good sports, like football and hockey, as well.

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Former Law & Order Director Arrested For Child Porn

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All right, so everything is still “alleged” right now, so I’m not going to jump totally off the deep end here. But if it turns out to be true, and this guy who directed episodes of Law & Order is guilty of downloading or purchasing child pornography, he’s gotta be one of the biggest idiots in the universe! Did he ever bother to watch the show he was directing? The villains in the show got busted for child porn all the frizzin’ time! And they showed in depth how the police tracked down these perverts. So how did he think he’d be able to get away with it, after all evidence to the contrary being waved in his face, week after week.

Either way, I am mostly writing about this as an excuse to play that classic theme song. Love that bass!

Click here to view the embedded video.

BTW, do you think the cops and lawyers on this real life case are in a hallway somewhere casually chatting and walking slowly? I think so.

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Watch This Guy Scare The Bejesus Outta This Reporter

Click here to view the embedded video.

Would ya look at her jump! You would think this was her first time doing a field piece. This type of thing must happen all the time for field reporters. I dunno, I guess startled is startled.

BTW, L.A. would be a terrible host for the Olympic Games. And like they need a reason to become even more vapid than they already are.

My money’s on Paris. That sounds nice.

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Canseco To Dress In Drag For a Week

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Canseco likes a good publicity stunt. Always has, always will. Probably because “nobody’s been talking about Jose Canseco too much these past many years.”

So Jose is planning to dress as a woman, nonstop, for an entire week, while documenting the happenings for his upcoming web series.

The former athlete and current buffoon, claims he’s doing it in support of Caitlyn Jenner (formally Bruce), but I’m pretty sure Jose has never even heard of Caitlyn or Bruce Jenner. Like I said, man likes a good publicity stunt.

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New Hoffa Evidence. Exciting?

Check out Jack's flawless Hoffa portrayal. Remember this?
Check out Jack’s flawless Hoffa portrayal. Remember this?

 

Just like in classic gangster movie style, a dying former Mafia associate told coppers that they were on “the right track” when they searched that New Jersey landfill for former Teamsters leader, Jimmy Hoffa. And then he preceded to die shortly thereafter.

Pretty exciting, no? Answers to history’s mysteries can be quite intriguing. Especially ones like this that have been cloaked in secrecy for so long.

That being said… If you’re already dying, WHY DON’T YOU JUST TELL US WHERE HE IS, ALREADY? HUH? HUH?

I mean really, what do you have to lose at this point, anonymous, former, low-level, mob member?

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FINALLY! A Condom You Can Spray On!

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Science has done us a solid, gentlemen!

No longer, after we pick up the third drunkest woman at last call (the drunkest would just be pathetic), must we have to struggle with: remembering where the condom is, opening the condom, putting the condom on, and hoping we managed step 1-3 correctly.

With this new grounding breaking invention, we can spray on a condom first thing in the morning and forget about it. Then, late that night, if we manage to finagle a lady home with us, everything will already be ready, already! Hoooo-Rah!

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What Happened To The Bud Light With Clamato In It?

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It was called the Chelada and it was stocked at most local grocery stores. Do you still have these in your area, I really want to know! I must find some, and soon!

There was nothing better than a few summers ago when I was lounging sipping on some drinks consisting of beer mixed with a calm based spicy tomato beverage. Oh, where hath my youth gone!!!

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Moms Be Hating On Bugaboo Stroller Ads!

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Come on, stay at home moms! Go out and get a job already!

Complaining about this ad, because the model is too thin, think it won’t help sell strollers cause that’s not how most new moms look.

Well, guess what, trolls! This ad is perfectly effective. I’ve already bought three Bugaboo strollers and the ads was only released a few days ago. In fact I’m probably gonna buy one or two more tomorrow!

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Hey! How Come There Hasn’t Been A Good Illuminati Conspiracy Lately?

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You’re kinda dropping the ball here, Jay and the gang. We haven’t had a solid political assassination, disguised lizard senator or contaminated drinking water scare in like forevah!

And I know, I know, I know. Those rumors are supposed to come from conspiracy nuts and not the Illuminati itself. But when you think about it, it really should be the Illuminati leaking the information subtly to a few off the grid individual loners, that nobody should in their right mind believe. And that’s what makes the cloaked group so exclusive. Do I have to come over to the manor, Jay-Z and teach you lot a class on secret societies 101.

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